Bend and Break
by Mystical Machine Gun
Summary: His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.
1. Chapter 1

_I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!_

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

 **Pairing** : Sasuke x Naruto

 **Summary** : His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

 **Disclaimer** : I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

 **Bend and Break**

Naruto, you are flunking, my teacher tells me while sighing audibly. She has put her glasses on top of her head wanting to look like the thing she spouts is grave as death itself. So, I ask her looking sternly into her grey drooping eyes and I so want to smack this bitch up. You are not dumb and I hate to see you acting on your impulses, she continues, but I am not really listening. The anger and hatred is already tingling on my fingertips and I feel the venom pushing through my veins and skin. God, I hate this whore.

This is your last year in junior high school, I am not saying you should make it count - I am saying do not dare to stick around for another year, she huffs. Finally we are talking, I grin maliciously. Yeah, yeah, you little dipshit, get back to class, she grunts and I thank her for the entertainment. I am an adrenalin addict and when I get mad, I lose all reason. A god complex and anger management issues supposedly. The answer is simpler than that, I fucking hate people.

I actually go school, every now then at least, since if I do not, then my foster dad will beat me up and as much as I would love to kick his face in too, he is big. It takes time to heal from those bruises. The apple does not fall far from the tree, even if they are of different species. We both know it. I am staying at home until I can get the fuck out, though staying is a bit far said about the couple of hours at night I spend there. The rest of the time I stay out drinking and smoking and occasionally whoring myself to get money.

Basically I keep interaction at minimum in school and no one wants to even breathe the same air as me, which works for me. Thus I cannot really comprehend this nerdy guy who sits behind me and fucking stares at me all the time. Sasuke something, who fucking cares. He has been doing that for a while now and it gets me ticking. He has got black rimmed glasses, greasy black hair and the goddamn son of a motherfucker is fat too. His pitch-black eyes are like glued to me and they burn a fucking hole into my back. I try to behave, I really do, but he makes it impossible.

You fucking faggot, I grunt as I leap from my chair towards him, but I am stopped by other guys and finally the teacher, who makes me go to the principal's office. Sasuke does not even flinch and keeps staring and following me with his gaze. I am not going to the office, but instead I stay near the door waiting for everyone to leave. Sasuke always stays behind. God knows for what reason. To blow the teacher perhaps. He is the only one in the classroom again and I motion towards him. The worst of my fit has dissolved at that time, but it does not mean that I can stand him.

What the fuck is wrong with you faggot, I grunt and push him against the back wall. Sasuke is half a head shorter than me and I raise him upwards with my fists, crumbling his shirt while doing so. He does not say anything, does not even let out a single noise, which annoys me to no end. He succeeds in making this feel pointless, which surprises me slightly. Stop fucking staring at me, I hiss and it is as if I am talking to a ragdoll. Fuck you, I tell him and let go. He is passive still and fucking keeps staring.

This keeps on happening basically every day and I am fuming inside, but I have to behave so that I can get out of this shithole. We have only four months' worth of school until I am fucking free from this and my dad, and this son of a whore cannot take that away from me. Every pore in my system fumes from anger and it is fucking hard not to vent it out. After PE and school I decide to stay behind so I could actually kill Sasuke or something alike it. I am so sick and tired of the shit and yet again he is the last one to leave the building, which is fucking hilarious. It is like he really wants to die.

I return to the locker room, where I find him putting his stuff back to his bag. You really do not have any self-preservation instinct, huh, I ask him and his movements halt. I am going to kick your face in, so that you cannot even look straight anymore, I groan at him and his pathetic posture. He does not move, does not run, but faces me and I keep thinking he is one stupid fuck. I push him hard against the locker room by his throat and really look at him. You are one ugly motherfucker, I tell him and what does he do? Pulls his arm from his side and runs it down my left cheek caressing my skin.

I fucking see red and mount my fist into his stomach until he is bent over. Oh, you better stop doing that, if you want to keep your arms intact, I sneer and twist his arm until he is on the ground. He has not even said a word yet, which I kind of admire. Then again, you seem to adore me so much that I think you should blow me and it is not going to be free either, but I have the feeling you would want to pay either way, I keep sneering in a singsong voice to him. Sasuke looks up from his position on the floor and I am sure his eyes glint.

I start unzipping my pants and I am actually amazed inside how he waits it like a dog. Even a horse has a mouth, I grin and take my dick out. Show me how much you want me, I order him and he gets on his knees and begins. Sasuke takes my cock into his mouth and begins feeling it up with his tongue. He is sucking and bobbing his head quite greedily and I let him do that for a while. You should remember that I always have the final word, I tell him and pull his face into my groin so that he chokes on my cock. You better learn to deep throat, if you want to satisfy me, I tell him and begin fucking is throat all the while he gags.

Again it is like the anger begins to evaporate until I empty my load into his mouth and Sasuke obediently swallows and chokes in turns. I pull him up and tuck my dick back in my pants. I am not free, I smile radiantly at him and he starts to rummage his bag for his wallet. Tears have pooled on his cheeks and his breathing still sounds funny, but I feel content. He offers me everything he has in his wallet and I lean in to look him in the eyes. If you want more, keep the money coming, I breathe into his ear and he shudders. I leave him standing there on his own and on my way out I have to congratulate myself for the easy money. This could actually work, like steady income of sorts and looking at his wallet, Sasuke sure is loaded.

 **Thoughts? Comments? Anyone?**


	2. Chapter 2

_I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!_

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

 **Pairing** : Sasuke x Naruto

 **Summary** : His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

 **Disclaimer** : I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

So now after school we keep up this money exchange, Sasuke sucking my dick and whatnot. He actually gets better at it and is eager to please, which I find pathetic and funny. I entertain myself by making him jerk off at the same time, so that I can watch how sorry excuse of a homo he is. His dick is swollen and the erection looks painful and fuck, is he a pervert or what. Sometimes I wonder what the fuck is wrong with him and how can he get anything out of this. But he does. He seems to be enjoying it too.

I know how to enjoy this of course, since well, it is kind of hard to whore yourself out if you cannot look the part. Also, it is easy sex, which means I do not have to take anyone to movies and pretend to listen and be interested just to get them under me. Repetition just gets boring along the way and I want the money. So, when we are in the toilet after everyone has gone home, I tell Sasuke that I do not want to look at his ugly face. He looks at me like a wounded dog and I pull him up.

You have been such an obedient dog that I have to reward you, I smile at him in a nasty way. His dick feels hard against my thigh and I lean in closer. Just this once, I let you inside, I whisper and I can hear Sasuke swallowing hard. It is not that I have not been fucked by guys before, but somehow I just want to see his reaction. His dick is pulsating now and his ragged breathing hits against my chest.

I do not have any condoms, I hear him saying and it is kind of cute. Well, I take it you are a virgin, so it does not matter to me, I tell him and he is such a masochist, this guy. He does not know whether I am clean or anything, and in a way I kind of perhaps expected him to ask me that. He does not. You know, I have taken it up my ass before, so…, I tell him while I look him into the eyes. Sasuke does not say anything to that and I tell him that I really love his lack of self-preservation. It turns me on, I moan into his ear and Sasuke just keeps huffing.

Sasuke begins unzipping his pants with shaking hands and I pull my pants fully down. He looks hot and bothered and nasty and I tell him that. I do not want to see your face, remember that, I tell him and he just nods. I turn to the stall wall and press my hands against it. Get on with it, I order and he complies. Sasuke positions himself behind me, spits on his fingers and begins fingering me. In swift motion he moves his two digits inside me until he pulls out and positions himself at my entrance. I am going to enter, he groans in a quiet voice and spits more to use it as a lube.

You are too slow, I grunt and he pushes now more with a force until his whole dick is inside my ass. It burns my insides and his cock is thick and demanding. Fucking hell, I groan and he starts to move without letting me adjust, which I like. Sasuke picks up the pace and I order him to do it harder and he slams himself so hard that I am pushed against the wall, its chilly surface cooling my burning skin. Fuck me harder, I keep repeating and he rolls his cock in me hitting my prostate relentlessly. There, faster, I huff and he delivers, he surely does.

I fucking come without even touching my dick, which is like the first time ever. I shoot my load to the stall wall and soon after Sasuke cums forcibly into my ass and it burns like needles. I keep repeating fuck all the while he keeps milking the last of his spunk into me, but does not pull out. The heat on my skin begins to cool down, and I tell him to fucking pull out and he does. I turn around and wipe my dick with paper and then I pull my pants up. He follows my example and the guy fucking radiates glee. You fucking disgust me, I tell him, but he does not seem to care. We walk out and part ways without saying a word, which works fine.

We keep fucking everywhere we can and he keeps obediently paying. I know I said that he could do it once, but instead I just raised the amount of money and let him keep doing this, since he at least got me off well both monetarily and physically. I put the money aside and I do not use it, since I will need it. Usually we fuck at school, in public toilets and whatnot, but occasionally also at his place.

His house is enormous and this only happens when his parents are not home, since I am not entering the house someone actually seeing or knowing that. His room is a good alternative to nasty and cold toilets and such, but it is not like I really care. It is just intercourse of which he pays and boy does he pay. I set the rules and make him do what I want, and the little masochist does everything without complaining.

He even eats his own sperm from my ass, which I find extremely hilarious. Even on our graduation day we kept fucking when all the others were in the hall for festivities. This was obviously for the reason that we were to part ways and I wanted to get every penny from him I could get. There were no parting words, even though I am quite sure that there is some lingering feeling on his face, but it is hard to tell when he is so impassive. In a way I am pleased that I get a great way out of this and I do not really need to do anything to make it so. The easy way out.

Like my teacher said, I am not stupid and I have never been. It was never an option to not to go to high school, but my first aim was to get out of the house. There is nothing parental in my dad, who thinks mom killed herself thanks to me. If he used his brains, he would know that she got fed up thanks to him beating her up and took the easy way out. I do not blame her. He used to beat me up too, until I became his size and started to hit back. Afterwards we kept a distance and avoided each other and interacted only when necessary.

The amount of money I got from Sasuke helped me to find a ratty and oddly cosy apartment, which was my own in a sense. It was relatively easy to find shady people to rent you shit when needed. There no one could say what I could do, and getting out of the house meant that I had one less reason to get angry. I cannot say I hated that. I enrolled to a low level high school that was basically tuition fee. I even managed to get two friends or sort of, more like guys to hang out with. Kiba and Neji did not annoy me too much, which is close to perfect in my case. Either of them knows nothing about my past and I tend to keep it that way.

 **Thoughts? Comments? Anyone?**

 **P.S. I do not use quotation marks and this is an actual literary style used by writers. I write from inside the main character's head and thus there's no direct speech. It's how they hear the things said. If it helps, try reading my story to yourself inside your head (sounds complicated, I know, but it works).**


	3. Chapter 3

_I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!_

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

 **Pairing** : Sasuke x Naruto

 **Summary** : His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

 **Disclaimer** : I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

You know, Hinata is so into you, Kiba snickers while looking at me knowingly. I tell him that I know, and the expression on his face hints that I should do something about it. Which I could of course. She is a great girl too, but I do not feel like I could be that invested in it. I do not know if I could enjoy the purity of the whole thing. Like, we could hold hands and blush, but then again I probably could not, since my purity flew out the window when I was thirteen and I got fucked in the ass by an old dude, who made weird whistling sounds during sex. I know I am clean as in no STDs, but my soul is tainted. Not that I mind of course. During that second year I was as far as at the point of discussing with Hinata and it was painfully slow in every way. No thanks.

During math our teacher tells us that we are getting a new transfer student and we should make him feel welcome, which feels oddly superimposed coming from his mouth. We did not get that many new people especially during the year, so I was mildly interested. There is a knock on the door and the teacher goes to open the ugly green door. Into the classroom walks a delinquent-looking guy and for a second I kind of wish he is a she. It is not really like I care. The guy walks to the front of the class and introduces himself as Sasuke Uchiha.

My ears picks that out and I almost slip from my seat to the floor. No fucking way. No. Fucking. Way. I look at him more closely and it cannot be him. Someone with the same name or something. Must be. Then his eyes lock with mine and I immediately recognize those eyes and the fucking stare I had to live with back in junior high school. Again those eyes bore into me with their familiar nonchalance. I cannot look away. What the fuck happened to that small and fat nerdy gay-ass boy?

When he is standing I can see he is taller than the teacher and thus taller than me. His black hair is ruffled and wild looking, his face full of piercings and metal. If he used to be fat, then there is nothing left of that as he is lanky but still somehow muscular, and I did not even know you could change like that. The glasses are gone too. He looks fucking good.

I weigh my options and either he recognizes me or he does not. He flashes a nasty grin towards me and I know he does. So, there goes that. Next on the list is whether he acts on that information and mostly, if he feels the need to share my past, since then I will fucking kill him. I have come into terms with the fact that I may like to breathe the same air with certain people and if he snitches, then I am on my own. Fucking hell.

The teacher makes Sasuke sit at the back and share books with what's-his-face and thus I cannot see him, since I sit a couple of desks in front of him. I feel restless in a way, until I assure myself that things will go the way they are supposed to. After class I get my bag and walk into the corridor to meet Kiba and Neji. Oh, is he the infamous new guy, Kiba snorts and looks at Sasuke, who is just leaving the classroom. Yeah, I breathe and I try not to look his way.

Sasuke walks to us, which proves that I was right. Fancy meeting you here, he smiles crookedly and I just snort back. You guys know each other, Neji asks and I do not want to elaborate. Sort of, Sasuke breathes and his voice is low and hoarse. Neji and Kiba look at us funnily and I tell them that we went to the same junior high school. Gladly they drop the subject, but of course they ask whether Sasuke wants to join us for lunch. Of course he fucking does for my dismay. It is goddamn weird how normal this feels and it is usually a sign of something worse.

After school Sasuke walks to me and tells me in a grave voice that we need to talk. How come, I ask him coating my voice with sugar. Sasuke looks displeased, which I like a lot. If you want me to keep shut about certain things…, his voice trails off and it fucking pisses me off. I do not like the tone in your voice, I tell him, but he just snorts. Let us go to your place, he grins weirdly and I would love to tell him to go fuck himself, but a voice inside tells me that I better hear him out. Just in case this would be something we could solve easily or I could just kick his face in. Either way.

Right, I tell him and we keep walking in silence. I let him in and I dump my shit on the floor. I like the ascetic feeling, he grins and I know I hardly own anything. Just a mattress on the floor, my computer on a small table, and a lousy chair on which I keep most of my clothes. I take it my money was not enough, he says nonchalantly, but I do not reply anything to that. I do not feel the need to own anything, I eventually tell him just to shut him up about this topic. We keep standing and watching each other closely.

I could give you more, money that is, he smiles once again in a weird way that does not feel like smiling. A happy coincidence to find you here and I was already getting bored, but now, he grins, but his eyes lack the laughter. I weigh my options. What do you want, I then ask. He walks to me and runs his fingers on my cheek. I want to buy you, exclusively, he breathes and looks at me closely. On my terms, he then continues and there is finality to his words. I want power over you like you had over me, he says after a pause looking pleased.

I have two options. To either say no way in hell and ditch his sorry ass or I could do this. I could get easy money once again and the sex was not so bad either. I hardly think he can come up with anything that I have not already tried, so that is not the case either. I am actually running low on money, since I have not been selling myself since I entered high school, so there is that too. I pay you good to be my bitch, he smiles in a hollow way. What does the contract include, I ask him and a smile creeps on to his face. Good boy, he says. I somehow have the feeling I have created a monster.

 **Thoughts? Comments? Anyone?**


	4. Chapter 4

_I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!_

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

 **Pairing** : Sasuke x Naruto

 **Summary** : His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

 **Disclaimer** : I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

Basically he pays to have sex with me, which was the case formerly too. The difference is that I have to be submissive and let him have the power at all times, although around other people he is to behave. Mostly this contract just binds sexual stuff and us being together, and not like slavery in the sense that I would need to clean his house or whatever. It would be a lot like dating, he told me. The contract binds us until the end of high school. I like how easy you are, Sasuke watches me and adds that he will enjoy humiliating me. Right, I tell him.

Why the fuck are you here anyways, I ask him. Oh, divorce and such, a broken family, he says, but does not continue. I take it his dad is probably paying him a lot for him to live by himself. It does not explain why you are in this shitty school though, I tell him and he just looks bored. Well, it was a messy divorce, he adds, but I do not believe him. Why would his parents' divorce make him stupider than he actually is? Like I can understand if that made him nuts in a way, but it still sounds fishy. I do not push it, since I do not really care.

Get on your knees, Sasuke orders me. That was fast, I tell him and he just snorts back at me. Whatever, I roll my eyes at him and get on my knees before him. I begin fumbling with his fly until I get his pants and then boxers down. Sasuke looks at me with that stupid look on his face, which makes me just want to get this over with and fast. Swiftly I run my tongue from the base to the tip until I take his cock into my mouth. His breath hitches, which is funny. I begin to work my magic on him by sucking and licking his cock hungrily all the while I keep moving rhythmically.

I swirl my tongue around the slit making these smacking noises that get Sasuke moaning audibly. It is not really that I enjoy blowing guys, but I am fairly good at it. Way much easier than taking a huge cock up your ass and pretend it is the best thing ever. I lift my left hand to the base of his cock keeping him steadily there and my right hand wanders to his ass. I pull him tightly into me so that his cock brushes my throat and that is what makes him spill his load into me.

The warm, sticky substance bursts into my throat and I swallow it cleaning his cock with my mouth. Then I pull away and he tucks his dick back into the pants. He pulls me up and takes my jaw into his hand squeezing my face. As much as I love you doing it like this, I would like to note that you need to follow me and not the other way around, he squeezes tighter. This may work with your other fucks, but I do not appreciate solo acts, he almost spits and slaps me hardly in the face. His ring cuts my lower lip and I wipe the blood from my mouth. I keep that in mind, I grunt and he has surely become anal.

I do not know what the fuck is wrong with Sasuke, but he wants me to act as if I have never blown anyone before. I have to be clumsy, so he can laugh and I am not a fan of make-believe shit, but this is stupid. Every time I do not obey him, he fucking hits me in the face, which is goddamn annoying. During school he then hangs with me and my friends, which also pisses me off, since he is in my sight all the fucking time. I keep my mouth shut though, since he pays me and he actually pays me quite a lot too, which is the only reason that I do not kill him.

The first couple of weeks the bastard just wanted oral sex, but judging by the way he looks at me in class and whatnot, I know he wants to slam his dick in soon. As much as he has a poker face, it is funny how in certain situations it slips and you can read him like an open book. On Monday he walks with me to my place, which he often visits even if I do not like that. He knows it and keeps coming. I do not know if he wants me to complain or if he simply enjoys this like he said. I do not complain, since he would rejoice that.

When we get inside he closes the door and pulls me into him so that I am my back against his stomach. I want to fuck you, he breathes into my ear and runs his tongue from the nape of my neck to my shoulder. Then the shithead bites the base of my neck, but I only reply that "do it". Sasuke turns me around and pushes me hard towards my bed. He shoves me and I end up on my back on the mattress. He gets down too on top of me and pushes me tightly into the softness of the sheets.

Sasuke begins undressing me until I am stark naked under him and after that he focuses on his own garments. I keep thinking that he better have condoms and lube and of course he does not. Spit works out fine, right, he smiles wickedly. Like old times, he says. He spits on his left hand and coats his fingers with his spit. With his right hand he begins fondling his cock while feeling me up with his left. I am amazed that you can do two things at the same time, I groan. That makes him push his fingers deeper into my ass and the jolt of pain makes me whimper against my wish.

Then he pulls out and positions himself in between my legs and starts pushing in. Fucking hell, I groan as it feels like my ass is about to tear open. Let me adjust, I tell him, but he does not do that. He pushes in forcibly and I am sure he breaks something while doing it. This time I will make you look at my ugly face, he says sternly and begins moving. It fucking hurts like hell. There is and never was anything wrong with your face, I groan and I mean it. I just did not want to look at the person, who was supposedly my client. I do not like it now either, but there is nothing I can do about it.

Sasuke eases his movements and looks at me once again weirdly. He slows down a bit and sets a rhythm. There is no way my dick would be hard after the treatment, which he notices and moves his hand to fondle me. He strokes me gently and feels my ass up and it feels intimate, which is odd. My dick grows in his hand and my ass starts to enjoy the fucking too. He finds my prostate quite easily, and I cannot help the moans that erupt from my lips when he relentlessly hits it. There is a wicked grin on Sasuke's lips and he keeps pumping me in a quickening manner. I am going to cum, I whisper to him and then I burst on my stomach.

Shit, I groan and I feel his cock pulsating in me as he shoots his load into my tight hole. It fucking stings like putting your hand on a hot stove, but I do not push him off. I just try to breathe, even though the pain makes me spasm. Not long after Sasuke pulls out and by the look on his face he has noticed what he has done. I push myself upwards to see that the sheets are bloody and Sasuke is eyeing me with a face I cannot read. I run my fingers though my hair. It is not like I have been doing this with anyone after you, so, I sigh. You could have played it nicer, I continue and Sasuke just looks at me, right, he says and his face looks a shade darker.

I need a smoke, I tell him and we get off of the bed and pull our clothes on in a perfect silence. We get on the small balcony and he offers me a cigarette. I thought you were loose, like fucking everyone, he says, but does not look at my face. His voice is somewhat hollow. I did not do all the shit just because of lewdness, I tell him. For what then, he continues looking at the tree near us. I needed the money to get out, I groan slightly and stump the cigarette on the railing.

I get back inside, but he does not follow me directly. I could have given you more, he says standing at the balcony door. If you needed the money, you should have just said so, he looks at me sternly again. I do not do charity, if I need money, then I will make it myself, I tell him just as sternly and he looks away. Right, he says and then there is silence that wraps us tightly like a fucking suffocating cocoon.

 **Thoughts? Comments? Anyone?**


	5. Chapter 5

_I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!_

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

 **Pairing** : Sasuke x Naruto

 **Summary** : His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

 **Disclaimer** : I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

Sasuke keeps coming to my place more often and just as often he spends his nights at my place. I feel like a fucking mistress, I tell him, since I have not been to his place like ever. I know nothing about his life, really. It bothers me up to a certain point, although I do not want to admit it. With his money I actually bought a small TV and some other minor shit that made me feel more like a real person living in a real home. Weirdly enough it is just not fucking we do, but we do other mundane shit together too, and every once in a while I notice that and it feels plain weird.

Sasuke has become a solid fourth person in our friend group, and I have hard time noticing that it is fucking odd. The same thing with the fact that we are eating Chinese takeout at my place right now. Goddamn odd. My phone rings and Neji and Kiba tell me that they are passing by my apartment and ask if they can come up. They have been to my place a couple of times before and I am amazed how OK I am with it. Sasuke goes to open the door and lets the guys in. You finally got yourself a TV, Kiba laughs and I tell him that obviously I can evolve.

Are you guys coming to the local pub, they are showing European football there, Kiba asks excitedly. I do not reply immediately and soon Neji cuts in. Errr, this is going to sound weird and probably inappropriate, but why do you have only one mattress if Sasuke is here all the time, Neji asks obviously ashamed, his cheeks tinted pink. Like do you sleep together or what, Neji laughs awkwardly and I look at Sasuke not knowing what to tell him. I try to come up with a good explanation, but nothing comes to mind. It is not like that, I then say after a silence right at the same time when Sasuke says "yeah". Shit. Fucking awkward.

Sasuke looks at me as if I just told the worst thing ever and I do not even know why. It is not like we are sleeping together, because we fancy one another and date, but because he hates me and wants to punish me, and I actually get money and it sounds problematic no matter what. I do not tell them this of course. Well, Neji and I will be going to the pub and you should meet us there if you want to, Kiba laughs unnaturally and pulls Neji with him. Bye then, Kiba shouts and Sasuke and I are alone once again. Why did you deny it, Sasuke asks me poisonously. I did not deny, but I did not confirm either, since there was no way to tell them the truth, I breathe.

I do not know how everything escalated after that and how words turned into fists and shoving. Insults fly in the air and it is like a cookie house coming down hard, leaving nothing but crumbles that feel raw in your throat. Sasuke has pinned me against the wall, our breathing echoing heavily in the room. His other fist is tightly around my shirt and the other only inches away from my face. My fists are tightly around the front of his shirt too.

Words heavy as hell leave our lips and there is no way we could take those back. He insults me, my past and the choices I have made of which he does not know enough. I shout at him and I tell him to get the fuck out and never to come back. I do not care if you tell the world, I fucking hate you, I spit at him and he slaps me hard right in the mouth. It breaks my lower lip like a balloon and blood spills down my chin and on to my shirt. Sasuke looks at me, looks at the dripping liquid and then walks away.

I am left in the otherwise empty apartment, broken in many ways. I had started to like the status quo, which horrifies me. It was not about the money and sex either, mostly I liked finally living somewhat normally. Talking and hanging out with people and not wanting to kill everyone every goddamn second. I do not regret the past, but obviously Sasuke thought otherwise. We hardly ever talked about important stuff, even when we spent most of our waking and sleeping hours together. What were we even doing?

Errr, you two should make up, whatever it is, Kiba says thoughtfully looking at me carefully. We do not mind if you are dating, right Neji, Kiba asks Neji, who nods aggressively. It is not like that, I try to tell them, but that is all I can offer. Sasuke keeps to himself and does not even look at our way. It is complicated, I try to say, but even to myself it sounds pathetic. After school Kiba comes to me and asks if we could talk. Ok, right, Neji was tactless and shit, but he did not mean any harm with what he said and now the guy feels like shit, Kiba says sheepishly.

Neji does not know shit, but I do, Kiba continues neutrally and searches my face for any signs. I do not know what he wants me to say to that. Sasuke is in love with you, you know, Kiba breathes carefully. No, he is not, I reply while scrunching my face. Yeah, he is and has been since junior high, probably, Kiba continues spouting bullshit. The guy basically lives at your place, has obviously sex with you and hangs out with you like a proper boyfriend and you tell me he does not love you, Kiba continues in a hoarse voice.

He pays me, I tell him. I know he does, Kiba retorts back. He gives you money because he loves you, you dipshit, Kiba snorts awkwardly. No, we have a contract, I say sternly to which Kiba says that it was the only way to make anything happen with me, because I am emotionally handicapped. How much do you know, I groan angrily, since I am going to kill Sasuke if he has told anyone about my past. Obviously not enough, Kiba looks at me surprised. I only know you wanted out and that Sasuke helped you back then, he then says sadly. If you even knew the half of it, you would not accuse me of this shit, I say to him in an ice-cold voice.

Even Sasuke does not know all and I tend to keep it that way, I glare at Kiba. You would not want to even breathe the same air, if you knew about the things I have done to survive, I snort and then close my mouth. It is not me to whom you should tell those things though, Kiba smiles sadly. How fucking blind can you be, when there is actually someone who wants to share that burden with you and you just keep pushing him away all the time, Kiba huffs. I called him, you know, he is on his way here, Kiba then says. What the fuck did you tell him, I scream at his face, but he does not say anything back to that. Fix it, you asswipe, Kiba lets out a small smile.

 **Thoughts? Comments? Really? Anyone?**


	6. Chapter 6

_I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!_

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

 **Pairing** : Sasuke x Naruto

 **Summary** : His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

 **Disclaimer** : I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

When Kiba leaves through the door, I hear someone else come in. Sasuke's breathing is ragged and he is sweaty. It looks like he ran like crazy and like hell here. He looks pathetically cute standing there like that. I just vomit everything out. The words leave my mouth so easily that it feels weird how long I managed to keep them in. It feels so good and bad at the same time. Sasuke's face is hard to read, but no one would be happy to hear the stuff I am spouting. I go into enough detail to notice how all color leaves his face and he looks physically ill. He must be thinking his own part in this and how my recklessness could have affected him in more ways than one.

After I get everything out I feel drained and hollow, but at the same time light. We just stand there looking at each other, and I do not know what will happen. Then Sasuke moves, first a little and then he gets to me, looking something in between sad and angry. He raises his arms and I automatically flinch getting ready to receive a punch. Instead he wraps is arms around me and pulls me into a tight embrace. He pulls me into him and hugs me burying his face into my neck.

I am so fucking sorry, he grunts and I tell him that I do not need his pity. I do not pity you, he groans and looks me in the face. If I had known, I would have helped you in some way, he says his voice betraying him. You could not have helped, we did not even know back then, I smile at him. I could have treated you better, he grunts and I tell him that I could have treated him better too. He takes my face into his palms and looks me into my eyes telling me that he loves me and has loved me for a long time.

I just did not have the right words and I thought that you would never respond anyways and that is all I came up with, pretty twisted, right, Sasuke whispers. I just wanted you so bad, he then smiles sadly. It is me who leans in to kiss Sasuke's mouth. I like having you here in my personal place, I groan. I like myself around you, I tell him and a small smile breaks on to his lips. You do not need to push it, he says softly and kisses my face gently.

My skin is burning as we trace the steps to my bed and the kisses feel hot and suffocating. It feels like our clothes melt from around us disappearing completely and we are entwined like two pieces of yarn. I sit on Sasuke lap facing him and he keeps me so close to him. I want you to sit on me, he whispers softly and helps me so that he can enter from that position. In that position the movement is small, but at the same time we can bury ourselves into each other and Sasuke keeps breathing heavily on my skin.

The heat from our bodies gets us sweaty and sticky, the friction burning in all the right places. The sex is divine, sensual and something I have never experienced before. It is uniting in every possible way, beautiful and complete. I whisper god's name in vain and I whisper Sasuke's name until it starts to hurt in my stomach in a familiar way that promises a release soon.

The pain is perfect and amazing, keeping me lingering on the edge until I climax without hands, just him rocking into me. Not long after I hear him grunting and burying his face into the crook of my neck, and I feel warmth travelling inside me until his cock stops pulsating. We do not detach and he does not pull out. Instead Sasuke looks at me and kisses me softly on the lips. Stay, I hear myself plead almost inaudibly and there is this warm smile that creeps to his face.

Stay he did. He moved in with me and we are currently working things out, finding how we can fit together like this, differently. I am actually seeing a counselor and trying to find means to vent my anger and sort out the feelings I felt like I lacked and those that were always on their way to explode. It is not for us, but for you, Sasuke said when he walked me to the first therapy session. It is going OK, even though I do not really like to talk about the past, but my logical side tells me that eventually I would go crazy without doing it.

Even after graduating high school Neji and Kiba stuck with us and they were quite fine with everything. I promised to tell them about it all at some point and they know I go to a therapy and still want to breathe the same air as me, so that is already a victory. It feels good that I do not need to carry this alone and at the same time I am scared to share it. We have actually started talking and we both suck at it, but at least we try. I know that I love Sasuke and it may be slightly crooked - I am learning to find the right words to say that to him, but I think he already knows.

We are still under twenty and it feels like I am so ready already. Like all those nasty years were just so tightly packed and made me grow up sooner. I, on the other hand, perhaps made Sasuke grow up too soon. We are an anomaly in a sense, but it is not necessarily a bad thing. I look at Sasuke, who is installing our new game console on all fours, trying to find the correct cables. I keep thinking that this person is mine and it just somehow slips. I love you, I smile gently at him. He stops what he is doing and turns around with a huge smile on his face, I know, he breathes. Good, I smile back.

The End

 **Now I really want and/or need comments – do tell me we what you thought!**


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